“thank you soo much you don’t know how much this has helped me” – Chelley, 16
Cyber-bullying is any harassment through technology.
It is unprovoked and unwarranted.
It affects at least 10% of Aussie kids*.
It can be 24/7, compounded by an audience watching, and can be viewed over and over again.
But this constructed world also offers unique possibility of evidence, and intervention.
The human motivations won’t change, but with action the damage, and behaviour can.
Keep in mind, it is not your fault, and sometimes people don’t really mean what they say, sometimes things get lost in translation. Don’t let the emotion of the moment guide your actions, step back, think for a while, maybe give it a day, and work through the steps below to resolve the situation so you can use the computer happily again. Finally, if you see someone else being bullied online, don’t be a silent bystander, but report the abuse yourself (but don’t intervene in the argument!), and it might really help someone who might not know they can do that.
Adults
Do not dare overreact or punish a child if they experience harassment online. 78% of kids are worried if they tell an adult; they will be disconnected from the computer, hence stopping them from sharing it. Kids also worry that it’ll complicate the situation, by having worried adults adding to the trauma and kids often think adults mightn’t be able to help. So firstly, don’t appear to be bothered (even if you are), and don’t disconnect a child. Let them know this. Let them know they haven’t done anything wrong, and you’ll talk to them about it, and work through the steps below to peacefully resolve the issue so they can use the computer happily again.
Schools
Make a cyber-safety policy, and endeavour to implement student involved education programs with a cyber-bullying component comprised of something like my guide below. If students are cyber-bullied by other students, in school time or not, you have a legal duty to intervene, do whatever necessary to support the victim, deal the perpetrator, remove the content and contact authorities if necessary. Also, the terminology ‘Cyber-Bullying’ can be perceived as corny and not taken seriously, so perhaps use online/internet bullying/harassment instead.
To Prevent – Tips
• Be extra sensitive about what you say online – what you intend may be perceived differently
• Don’t incite abuse, by arguing, flaming or annoying someone
• Consider it might not mean what you think – things can be perceived not as they were meant online
• Don’t Share Passwords with friends – they fight!
• Make hard-to-guess secret questions so people can’t get into your accounts
• Turn on comment moderation to stop offensive comments from being published
• Tell your friends if a joke goes too far
• Only get Formspring profiles etc. if you can take abuse
• Ask them to stop harassing you, and if they don’t…
To Resolve – 5 Steps
1. Don’t respond AT ALL (It will make it worse)
2. Save the evidence for future reference (Instruction Below)
3. Block and Delete the perpetrator from the website or service (Instruction Below)
4. Report Abuse to the Admins of the website or service, to remove the content and punish the perpetrator (Instruction Below)
5. Tell People you Trust – friends, adults, teachers, parents to support you, and help deal resolve it, and police if necessary – especially if it’s anonymous – as it can be a criminal offence
Saving the Evidence
Make a folder on your computer to save all the evidence in. To save text, highlight it (press Ctrl-A, or Apple-A on Macs to highlight it all), and copy it into a notepad or word document. To take a screenshot (a picture of your computer screen), search for the ‘snipping’ application. On Windows XP and older and press the print screen button (above the arrow keys, top right of the keyboard), then go into the start menu, programs, accessories, paint, press Ctrl-V (copy), and click file and save. On Macs you can press apple-shift-3 to save a screenshot to the desktop. To save an image on a webpage right click on it (or control-click on Macs) and select ‘save image’. To save a YouTube video or other online video, visit – http://vixy.net/ – post the ‘web address’ of the video into the ‘URL’ box, and then click start. It will convert the video into the .avi file type that can play on Windows & Macs, and then let you download it onto your computer.
Deleting, Blocking and Reporting Abuse to the Administrator
Log in, visit a profile and select ‘unfriend’ at the bottom left to remove a person. You can select ‘Report/Block This Person’ there too and follow the steps if you want to block them too. To report abuse, click ‘Report/Block This Person’, and follow the steps. Sometimes there are report links accompanying posts.
YouTube
You need an account, to get one click ‘Create Account’ up the top right, and register. If you have a Google account you can sign in with that too. Login to your account, when watching any video click the flag icon, which will give you an option of selecting why you want to report it, probably ‘bullying’ under ‘Hateful and Abusive Content’, or otherwise if it’s something else, and click ‘Flag This Video’.
Formspring
To report people click ‘Help’ at the bottom, ‘Submit a Request’ at the top and fill in the details. To block a user
select ‘Block Their Name’ at the bottom right of their profile.
To make your Formspring private click ‘Settings’, ‘Privacy’, and select ‘Protect
My Account’. In the same section you can disallow anonymous questions from people who
aren’t logged in, or disallow anonymous questions completely.
MSN
Log in, right click on contact in your contact list and select ‘Delete contact’. When the dialogue box pops up, select ‘Also block this contact’ as well and click ok. Click the ‘Help’ menu (Alt-H if it doesn’t appear), and click ‘Report abuse’ – Type your name, email in – the bullies email – what type of abuse, and then paste the evidence in the box. You could also turn message history on to ensure the evidence is recorded. To do this, click ‘tools’, ‘options’, ‘messages’ and tick the box that says ‘automatically keep a history of my conversations’. If you want to, you can download Messenger Plus here – which has a function of recording your message history with password security.
Bebo
Login, click ‘Friends’, click the cross icon on the perpetrator to delete the perpetrator. Now visit the perpetrator’s profile, and click ‘Block’ and click ‘Report Abuse’, then click ‘Report Abuse Only’. Make your profile private by clicking on ‘Profile’, ‘Edit profile’, ‘Privacy Settings’, select ‘My friends only’ and ‘Update Privacy Settings’.
MySpace
Log in, select ‘Friends’, select who you want to delete, and click ‘Delete’. Visit their profile, click on the arrow next to the clog wheel icon, and select ‘Block User’. To report abuse visit the perpetrators profile, click on the arrow next to the clog wheel icon, and select ‘Report Abuse’. Put in your name, email, type of abuse, detail the relevant evidence, provide links and click ‘Report’. To make your profile private, hover over ‘My Stuff’ up the top, select ‘Privacy Settings’ and selection ‘My Friends only’ and save the changes.
Right click on message or open the options menu and click ‘view source’ or ‘headers’, and copy and save that. Block the perpetrator’s address in settings if you can. Notify your ISP, notify the perpetrator’s ISP if you want.
Games
Runescape, click the report abuse button down the bottom right. For others, Google search the games name and report abuse. Eg. Runescape report abuse.
Mobiles
Only some phones can block numbers, go into the settings and select block caller – put the perpetrators number in. Contact your service provider, report it to them. Contact the perpetrator’s service provider (if known) and report it.
Random websites/forums
Click contact admin button, send them an email or message and most likely they will take action against the perpetrator. For services/website’s you’re not sure about visit abuse.net’s web lookup page to see if they have an email address, or try emailing it to abuse@thewebsite.com oradmin@thewebsite.com etc.
Finally, contact your local police if you need more help, or want to take it further.
New South Wales
Victoria
Queensland
South Australia
Western Australia
Tasmania
Northern Territory
Australian Capital Territory – 131444
Federal Police – 131444, (02) 6131 3000 in Victoria and Queensland
You can also call Kids Helpline on 1800 55 1800 or access web counselling if you want personalized support.
This guide may be reproduced free of charge as long as I am notified and author details are included.

Good guide…would be good to include instructions for kids who use macs so that they are not left out of the equation
Good point. I’m a mac n00b though lol. I guess the only change would be the MAC version of MSN. I’ll edit that in ASAP. Thanks, bmgs;)
Yeah Mac is spelt “Mac” as it isn’t a MAC, which you should know, buddy.BR/BR/Why don’t our children just harden up? I mean seriously, I’ve been a victim of Cyber Bullying and I just laugh it off. BR/BR/It’s character building
I’m really mad that my mom made me give in to bullies… I got in one little fight and my mom got scaredBR/And said “you’re moving with your aunte and uncle in bel-air”.
I say you should learn these kids to use the F*ing block button!BR/BR/It’s there for a reason..to block people.
Keep up the good work mate.
ebaumsworld.com should be SHUT DOWN!
lol wut
the guide didnt mention mudkips tho…
Hopefully people from such sites as ebaumsworld.com would take notice of their actions and realize that what they are doing is abuse.
Yes I often get e-mails telling me to do a barrel roll, and that ebaums does not forgive/forget, what actions could I take to prevent those faceless and anonymous from “Cyber-Bullying” me? – Susej
hey tomBR/I’ve got some friends on a website called ebaum’s world and we regularly go out and stab people for fun. why do people bully me?
So you hacked through the government porn filter. Would you be able to offer me advice on how to hack through the one installed on my computer?
In a situation where in someone is provoked into a dispraportionate response (such as the infamous Mudkip incident), how would you suggest that the targetted individual react?BR/BR/(for the Mudkip story – http://www.wikichan.org/index.php/Mudkipz)
Hi TomBR/BR/Just wanted to know where you’re getting your stats from. In future could you please provide a reference for all statistics you quote – it would really add to the credibility.
You sir are an hero. Htis guide was very helpful and doesnt afraid of anything
I love you
I don’t understand, all your info is just basic common sense, I lol at the ignorance youth has these days.BR/BR/Still a commendable effort on your part Tom.
Well done mate! Great segment. I made my daughter log off and come and watch it. Thankfully I’m pretty savvy with the net and it’s behaviour, but she really got a lot out of your advice and the segment. Nice work!
tom wood is eh pretty cool guy. he fights teh cyberbulliez and doenst afraid of anythinBR/BR/go tom wood!BR/BR/-luke 15 penrith
Hi,BR/BR/awesome guide.BR/BR/Few problems though, I was with my daughter who had been bullied over the internet, and she was nagging but I had just found a shiny pidgey so I couldnt put up with her. BR/BR/How can I get her to understand that pokemon comes before parenting?
me being a slowpoke on the internet, i feel you helped a lot..
Tom,BR/BR/Excellent advise that should be taught at ALL schools when learning computer skills. Now we just have to get the bullies out of the playgrounds and teach our kids how to be more confident.BR/BR/Keep up the good work.
Hey man,BR/Ignore all the smartass comments people have left here.BR/What you’ve done is awesome. It’s raising the awareness of parents and teachers, and showing kids more intelligent ways to deal with such situations.BR/BR/You should start some kind of cyber bullying awareness group (maybe on facebook or myspace). If you do i’d be keen to help out.BR/BR/By the way I actually know you, I finished year 12 at mgs last year hahaBR/Keep up the good work mate,BR/you’re a champion.
“Finally, if you see someone else being bullied online, step in and take action yourself, you may well save a life.”BR/BR/I am an IT advisor to WA education dept. I must strongly disagree with the line I quoted from you guide. Children should not get involved in other’s bullying situations and should inform superiors instead (such as teachers). I have been bullied and cyber-bullied to the extent where I had to get a restraining order. Now other should not get physically or in any way involved in other being bullied just tell a responsible adult. Because when other kids get involved the entire situation escelates.
‘Hack Alive’ – I think I need to clarify that recommendation. What I meant is, instead of being a silent bystander, if you see someone getting bullied on the net, report it yourself, as the person who is getting bullied mightn’t know how to, and it may really help them. Doing this can only result in positive results and won’t have any negative ramifications. I’ll change the line and make that clearer. Thanks for pointing this out.
Hi,BR/BR/I’ve been a cyber bully victim for a number of years now and as a result, i had to file a restrainting order to protect myself.BR/BR/However, i insisted in ‘cyber bullying’ my cyber bullies in retaliation for their cyber bullying, and i discovered my superiority over them. Now becoming a cyber bully, my self esteem had escalated and now my confidence around those traumatized individuals had grown.
Tom,BR/BR/You’re an awesome kid, i like your work. Keep it up son!!!!BR/BR/I’m Chris Martin from Coldplay and i’m going to sing “Fix You”. This is for victims of cyber bullies:BR/BR/Lights will guide you home,BR/and ignite your bones,BR/and i will try to fix you,BR/BR/Join in everyone!!BR/BR/cheers
Hey toms its Peter Mitchell from 7news I would just like to say I have read many blogs on the internet and I am starting a new segment for 7 news called Petes Blogs where I present a blog that has interest me on the internet and I would just like to say your blog did not make the selection.BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/BR/Cheers P
Hi Tom i saw you on 60 minutes and I would just like to reveal my secret homosexuality to you. BR/BR/I’ve been keeping it secret for too long now but you’ve inspired me to cum out of my shell. BR/BR/meet me at Flinder’s Street Station on the 3rd of May 2008, 9:30 pm. we can have a night out together (wink) (wink)BR/BR/Thanks Walli
Hey Tom,BR/I saw you on 60 minutes :]BR/You’re pretty cute i can’t believe your like only 19? I felt sorry for that girl she should just stand up and punch the other chick in the face lol, not really but you could tell where the bully got her attitude from – HER MUM! BR/Jess.
Bullys are always (and I mean always) protected by their MUMS and DADS, it is always someone elses fault either the school or bullied student
This is a great thing you’re doing! And to anybody that believes victims should “harden up”… Easier said than done. And perhaps cyber bullying has robbed you of your empathy. I hope that if you have children you don’t teach them this value.
I think that what you’re doing is great. Sometimes it’s really hard for people to ‘toughen up’ and haveing someone give tips on how to deal with it is awsome.
[...] and teachers, and if necessary go to the police. My Guide to Cyber-Bullying expands on this - http://thewoodverdict.com/?p=35 7. If a kid is suffering from cyber bullying, how is it possible to ‘disconnect’ them in [...]